Chapter 4: A Tale of Two Cities

Arrived at hostel in Xian - dumpling party. Brilliant.

Next day was the main reason for our visit to the city, to see the Terra Cotta Warriors. Emperor Qin ordered these armies to be built around 200 B.C. and they were only discovered in the 1970's by farmers digging a well. Qin believed he needed protection in the after life so had them all created then buried a mile from where he would eventually be laid to rest.

Had a few chinks in their armour :)

On the way back, clearly on the take, our guide took us to some kind of silk factory. Just as things couldn't get any duller we found ourselves front row and centre for a live silk fashion show. Very professionally done, complete with local models who obviously tried to sell us their silky garments afterwards. On the bus on the way home our guide (who looked like a Chinese Mr Bean) announced "I like the girl models. They give me a special feeling."

I'd keep that to yourself If I were you Bean. Ladies present.

That night we went to the Big Goose Pagoda - a fountain and light show spectacular. It was most tranquil. The city of Xian is mainly contained within a large wall, which you can go up on and cycle round. So we did. I guess this wall was built to keep out invaders, but noticed several of the cannons were pointed inwards. It's a bold tactic, but I don't see it working for them.

Being in China, we played table tennis:
Harper (Eng) 3-0 Jones (Eng). 21-5, 21-10, 21-6.

We were reliably informed that the staff at our hostel earned 500 yuan (30 pounds) a month. 'Thats shocking', I thought to myself, as I headed to reception and purchased 1 stamp with a 100 yuan note and stood there for 10 minutes as they scrambled round trying to make change.

Trains to Shanghai were a complete no-go due to the pesky Chinese holiday (still not ended since our arrival in Beijing) so we had to catch a plane instead. Found a bar showing the England - Croatia game. We had many more shots than the team did - Rich passed out on a bench before kick-off. Textbook. He awoke and suffered through the 2nd half as I did. Went home via McDonalds.

Went sight-seeing in Shanghai. People there, much like in most of China stared at us like we were carrying round a severed head. Fortunately one guy over-stared and crashed his bike into the pavement. Got one!! As darkness falls, the city becomes very beautiful to walk around and is quite mesmerising:

Shanghai Nights

However, if I were a tactful person I would say downtown Shanghai has a 'particular untoward odour'. I am not a tactful person. It smells of shit.

So its time to say Zai Jain to China as we head south to Vietnam. Train journey was just over a day. This time I went armed - pipe of pringles, bottle of vodka and Jules Verne's 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. Super. One more train and a taxi/deathmobile brought us to the border. Known as The Friendship Gate, it is the point at which Michael Palin passed through as part of his round the world travels. It was Richard's idea to moonwalk through it, not mine.

Shamon Vietnam!!

So then, Vietman awaits. Apocalypse Now? Hope not.