Chapter 6: Boys on Tour

Went out with Hostel Massive. Found 'Beer Hoy'. 10 of us had 2 beers and the bill came to £1.20! For the mathematicians out there thats 6p each. Worked out on Steven Gerrards wage he could drink a beer every two thirds of a second, without so much as stopping to have a go on the Tarrant machine.

Went on a 4 day Trek with 2 guys we met in Hanoi - Dan and Baz. Despite both being ex-PWC are a lot of fun. Humour and maturity matches ours pretty well. First night our guide, Mimi Ju, took us to her local bar. By 'guide' I mean 12 year old girl and it was full of equally aged locals that looked identical to her. It was like being in a Vietnamese Umpa-Lumpa factory. They all claimed to be 17-21 but we reckon 11-15. The ones who weren't already married tried to bag themselves a handsome western husband. They wanted to get married 'for sure' or 'for fun'. Either way I'm pretty sure my house would get burnt down.

In the morning we did a 14k trek. Pot bellied pigs and buffalo roamed free.

Enthusiasm after 13.9k was high

That night we stayed in a village. They had a hot spring and waterfall. Met a guy who had no control whatsoever over his eyebrows. Trekked back up the hill. Male pride took a hit as the girls helped us to the top. They liked to play tricks along the way. I may have fallen for the 'Whats that on your shirt - look down - get punched on nose' routine, but alarm bells were ringing following 'Do you like chocolate? Theres a pile of it there under that buffalo'.

Mimi Ju at the taxi rank

Leaving Hanoi behind, the 4 of us got a bus to Hue. Got drunk at 'Brown Eyes'. On the way home we decided we would hire 2 peddle-powered taxis and make the drivers race us back to the hotel. Bless them - they peddled their little hearts out! Went passed a dead dog floating in the river which for some reason got a big cheer. Harper/Jones won by a nose. Most exhilierating part of the trip so far!

Spent a couple of days in the next town, Hoi An. Met up with 2 girls from Hanoi - Sandra and Hull (not her actual name, but thats where she is from and we feel she needs constant reminders of her embarrasing heritage). Went on a day trip to some ruins and had a boat ride.

Not sure what I was doing here. Over to you Freud.

Next town - Nha Trang. Beach resort but waves so big you cant go swimming. Went with the guys to Thap Ba Hot Spring Centre. Had a mud bath, hot mineral water bath, swim, 45 minute massage (which included little Vietnamese women walking on our backs - and we were all glad we were not in America for this particular treatment) and finished off with a sauna.

If its good enough for the buffalos.....

We decided that as we had just spent a fairly girly day together, we better do something manly in the evening to balance things out........... so we went to 'Sailors' for cocktails.

Vietnam has been awesome but sadly time on the visas is fast running out. Only one city left to see - and we certainly don't want to Miss Saigon.